Wednesday, 27 August 2008

It's Not The End Of The World

Do you think that the end of the world, the end of all life, the death of your loved ones and their loved ones and everything you've ever known would be "uber fun" or "uber cool"? Do you even know what "uber" means? If these people actually meant that this fist-biting clown-fest was going to be "the party to end all parties", then I for one would applaud them as it would surely follow that I wouldn't have to suffer any more of these ridiculous emails. "Please include in you previews", you previews? Can't you even get the first line right? Or, as an LiS reader from an Important Media Organisation has it:

One flaw with this, and it's possibly not the only one, is that the world didn't end on October 11, 1986, so it's rather built on a false premise, eh? "8pm-1am (or until we all die)? But you're not going to die at this night, are you? And is having a Britain's Got Talent finalist something to brag about when your night is meant to be "uber [without the umlaut] cool". Aside from that, top marks for your effort to make another version of School Disco sound like it isn't another version of School Disco.

----- Forwarded Message -----
"georgia@getinvolvedltd.com" [georgia@getinvolvedltd.com]
26/08/08 14:56
Subject: 11/10/08**The End of the World party**

THE INFAMOUS UBER FUN ,UBER COOL END OF THE WORLD PARTY IS BACK !
Please include in you previews and listings sections. I have an extremely limited review guestlist so please let me know if you would like to come asap. Dress code and all other info is below..
Kindest Georgia

It’s your last night on Earth.

So party like there’s no tomorrow.

DJ’s: The Loose Cannons / Miss V / The Angel of Mercy
Performers: Craig - Hula Hooper (Britain’s Got Talent finalist) / Matt Hennem – Contact Juggler And More TBC…

Dress Code:
1986 – RUSSIA VS AMERICA
Think Russian Spies, All-American Power Players, Margaret Thatcher, Madonna, Rocky IV, general citizens of the 80s, in fact anything 80s.

8PM – 1AM (OR UNTIL WE ALL DIE)/ 93 FEET EAST / £7 WWW.TICKETWEB.CO.UK

THE NIGHT
The End of the World is a themed clubbing experience at 93 Feet East, London E1. An unavoidable catastrophe is looming. We’re all going to die. But rather than mope around feeling sorry for ourselves, we’re throwing the party to end all parties. It’s your last chance to do all the things you always wanted to do and be the person you always wanted to be. The night combines DJs, live acts, and story telling and offers people the chance to party like there is no tomorrow.

THE STORY
The year is 1986 and a global catastrophe is looming YOU'VE DONE THIS BIT ALREADY. The Cold War between the Soviet Union and America has reached breaking point. On the night of 11 October the USA will launch an all-out nuclear attack on the Soviet Union. The Soviets will respond in kind, and the world will be obliterated. There will be no survivors. To avoid mass panic the governments of the world are doing their utmost to prevent this news from reaching the public, but we know the truth OH JESUS.

When the news breaks, some people might rush to be with their families; some might head for their places of worship; and some might simply be consumed by misery and self-pity. Then there will be some, like us, who might want to accept our fate, laugh in the face of adversity, gather together all the people we love and have the most self-indulgent, dirty, debauched night of our entire lives so that when we go out it’s with love in our hearts and smiles on our faces!

So, if you want to die happy, come to the party to end all parties, on your last night on Earth.

COUNTDOWN
A huge countdown clock and newsflash interruptions continually remind clubbers that they are here in celebration of their last few hours. Incredible acts will keep you entertained throughout the night and the indulgence area will make you feel like a million dollars on your last night ever.

ANY LAST REQUESTS?
It’s their last chance to dance, so the clubbers should choose the music! In the weeks running up to the night, guests can email in their “Last Requests” – the songs they want to dance their last dance to. As the clock ticks down, the DJs mix their chosen tracks and we party until we explode.


THE END
Our doom is inevitable but at least we’re in it together. As the clock ticks down, love spreads around the room as we say our final goodbyes before we countdown to destruction and enter the unknown…….there’ll be no survivors, but at least we’ll go out with a bang.

DRESS CODE

1986 – RUSSIA VS AMERICA
Think Russian Spies, All-American Power Players, Margaret Thatcher, Madonna, Rocky IV, general citizens of the 80s, in fact anything 80s.

THE END OF THE WORLD
SATURDAY 11 OCTOBER
8PM – 1AM (OR UNTIL WE ALL DIE)

3 comments:

simon h b said...

I suppose if you're in a place where the entertainment is hula hoops and bloody jugglers, at least the end of the world would come as a blessed relief.

----- said...

what does a "general citizen of the 80s" look like? I recall seeing a binman collecting the refuse from outside my parents house in about 1985, he was possibly wearing a donkey jacket but I might be wrong. Is that the right kind of thing?

Lost In Showbiz said...

My question: If it's the "end of the world" then why are you charging me money? You can't take it with you, you know...