Wednesday, 12 March 2008

Current Fun

What this wincingly awful press release forgets to mention is that Nickelback are the single worst band of all time, an abomination of a band, a troupe so awful, so tawdry and ungainly, so devoid of the humour, humanity and soul that go to elevate musicians from the everyday to somewhere near the divine that they make Ray Quinn look like Bob Marley. Having said that, the Roadrunner wonk gets to over use the word "current" and play with the accepted notions of where verbs and adjectives should appear in sentences, so it's not all bad...

------ Forwarded Message
Date: Tue, 11 Mar 2008 20:34:16 +0100
Subject: NICKELBACK announce UK tour

Multi-million selling Canadians NICKELBACK are set to return to the UK for a string of arena shows this Autumn.

The band are currently riding a tsunami of radio and video play for their current single, ‘Rockstar’. The track has resided in the upper reaches of the UK singles chart since December 2007 and is taken from their latest album, ‘For All The Right Reasons’ which has also shifted a staggering 9 million copies to date globally. Both releases currently sit at No.3 in the respective UK singles and albums charts.

Incredible statistics are what NICKELBACK excel at. They connect with people on a level far beyond the ordinary and that is reflected in global album sales of around 26 million albums and BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH. "We can’t wait to get to the UK and give our fans the BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH!"

Be sure to catch the band at one of the BLAHBLAHBLAH!


Andy Beaumont said...

Ever heard the mashup of two of their songs running side by side?

Andy Beaumont said...

Damn comment formatting. Try this one...