Monday, 31 March 2008

"You’d be silly to miss such an astonishing band"

No I wouldn't. I've been saving this one for a few days so I can enjoy it in peace, but now I want everyone to have their chance to wallow a little. If we were to take it apart bit by bit we'd be here all day, but let's agree to agree that none of us have ever heard of Vinny Vinny - although we have heard of Vincent Vincent and his Villains - and the chances our minds will be "blown" by a dish-water dull, four-square indie group such as this shower are about as likely as discovering that their record isn't a bruisingly tedious retread of a million other bruisingly tedious records we've already suffered. Having said that, I'm promised here that these "taste-maker ticklers" ("championed by Dr Martens and Levis") will "take 2008 by storm", so I'm fully willing to apologise when they do. But, to make it fair, I want a written apology when they don't. OK? And supporting The Holloways is not an "envious gig" it's an "enviable gig" (except it isn't, they're one of the ten most awful bands in the country), but let's not worry about that too much right now.

------ Forwarded Message
From: clarewoodcock.com
Date: Tue, 25 Mar 2008 12:22:46 +0000
Subject: Invite to Vinny Vinny single launch

VINNY VINNY ‘BLAHBLAHBLAH’
MONDAY CLUB RECORDS
RELEASED: BLAHBLAHBLAH

Vinny Vinny are the sharp-suited 4-piece band that you’ve been hearing good things about since last summer. Vinny Vinny are BLAHBLAHBLAH and they’re about to blow your mind.

Broke up the Family is the highly charged second single from the celebrated Southend Soulsavers Vinny Vinny, who are ready to take 2008 by storm. Their first single One Eyed Maniac tickled the tastemakers in all the right places and became the explosive platform for good things to come for these honest Nu Soul boys from Essex.

2007 was a mighty achievement for such a new band seeing them catapulted into the heady hedonistic heights at the infamous Ibiza Rocks gigs, supporting The Holloways – an envious gig for any group arriving on the scene – resulting in them being hotly tipped by mega-hip rock publication BLAH and indie bible BLAHBLAH. Having been championed by Dr Martens and Levis, they have proceeded to perform groundbreaking gigs at BLAHBLAHBLAH. Vinny Vinny are ready to continue on their Nu Soul crusade.

Their new single ‘Broke Up The Family’ is a catchy charismatic charged up pop track with classic guitar driven riffs. Slices of rhythm and blues cut throughout the track, and, with the raw tasty vocals of front man Rick Nunn, a cracking bass line, driving drums and raw guitars, it brings together a kaleidoscope of influences that punch throughout this storming second single, creating a genuine foot-stomping floor filler.

Vinny Vinny have a special energy and passion, which oozes from them and their genuine madness about music and what they do. They don’t stand still – and neither will you!

Watch out for their electric shows to support Broke Up The Family. You’d be silly to miss such an astonishing band.

6 comments:

Rhodri said...

I see that their passion oozes from their genuine madness.

C#nts.

I've been waiting for a blog like this for some time. I hope you're emailing each of the cretinous PRs and alerting them to their naming and shaming.

What astonishes me is that they believe that the way of attracting the attention of a weary editor is to go over-the-top with superlatives, when it actually has the opposite effect.

I'd be far more likely not to bin a press release if it was just honest, and said... I dunno, that the band had a following of about 20 or 30 people – mostly from their local pub – and they're doing alright, nothing spectacular, but they're enjoying carting amps across town in the back of their cars once a week to rehearsals, and this tune is probably the best they've come up with so far, they're not sure.

Something like that.

Lost In Showbiz said...

My perfect press release would say this:

This record isn't as good as the records you actually like and no amount of me pretending - for money - that it is will ever change that fact. Sorry.

That would be ideal.

----- said...

Always especially pleasing when the press release implies that we lowly scribes are stupid, witless and wankers for not recognising the historic greatness of Band X, Song Y or album Z.

BTW, I long for the day a band is touted as transcending precisely zero genres, breaking absolutely no rules whatsoever and not destined to take next week, month or summer "by storm".
Similarly, I cannot recall the last time a band was not "hotly tipped".


BTBTW - I think I may have kept somewhere the press release introducing James Lavelle & DJ Shadow's debut album - seem to recall it was descibed back then - 1999/2000, praps - as the "Apocalypse Now" of trip hop.

Woah.

I'll shut up now.

mark said...

I like that they achieved an entire year.

People should not confuse how television and radio presenters speak with the best way to write.

"2007 was a mighty achievement for such a new band seeing them catapulted into the heady hedonistic heights at the infamous Ibiza Rocks gigs, supporting The Holloways"

My first thought is: Does no one ever read back anything they write?

My second thought is: Oh my god, they do and they think it sounds good.

Cheers,

Mark

the good said...

Ok, let’s get things straight. I find you people very dull. This is the worst website full of the kind of people who never bring anything to society nor attempt to create anything of use with your slow, bitter and arrogant minds.

The author of this particular blog has the literacy prowess of a retarded clown. And the rest of you should stop reading this. Haven’t you got another shit website to go on and make your perfectly useless comments.

Does one base their opinions on a painting by the review? Or the success of a car by the advert?

I agree press releases are tedious, but unfortunately their all written by tedious bags of dung like yourselves.

The fact of the matter is that, their lots of bands, creating, writing and touring for nothing more than the thrill of the music they create. Sometimes that atmosphere is not created on the record or not captured in the press release. Maybe, and here’s a thought, you should leave your bedrooms go out and see a few bands, before you make such rash and ignorant assumptions.

mark said...

Calm down chief!

PR is a job. It is possible to do jobs in ways that are good and ways that are bad.

The press release above is bad. It's full of bad uses of language and ill-thought out assertions.

It's written in the style of a press release as people think press releases should be written.

It a good example of words running away with someone. It's what happens when someone doesn't think about what the words they write actually mean.

If you have a job, or even a hobby, where you communicate with people, it's a good idea to learn how to do it well.

Especially if the people you want to communicate with make stuff out of words for a living.

As to the band, this release didn't tell me anything about them, and as such I don't have any opinion either way. It just had a load of hyperbole gummed together at random.

That's a bad press release for you, which doesn't do anyone in the world any favours, not least the people that it is representing.

Cheers,

Mark