Friday, 26 September 2008

Black Country Mocked

I am passing you straight over to a senior LiS reporter at the scene of a horrendous PR pile-up:

This is just staggeringly bad, poorly thought-through, stupid and otherwise utter, slavishly Nathan Barley-esque codswallop.

1. It's not news. News is about events, not perceptions.
2. If "local pride sees each region voting its own accent as the coolest", logic therefore suggests that almost no-one in the West Midlands voted in this lamentable "poll"
3. More respondants ticked "other/don't know" than ticked "Queen's English". Surely that only proves that no-one knows what the coolest accent is.
4. There is absolutely no doubt that residents of the West Midlands are mortally wounded by this "kick in the teeth" administered by a bunch of fixed-gear-riding durr-brains based off Redchurch Street in Shoreditch.
5. There is absolutely zero value in proving that something is not in vogue. Hailstorms, Burger King, tapestry, nitrogen dioxide and Pitt The younger are not in vogue either. This is not news, or even remotely interesting.

Memo to IDG - please stop "generating" "ideas" such as this and go work in the fields instead. You would be of far more use there, if only as fertiliser.

From: "Anna Hartley" []
Date: 24 September 2008 09:16:24 BDT
Subject: Brummy is the least cool accent - CoolBrands 2008 proves West Midland twang is not in vogue

**Full CoolBrands list will be announced September 29th**

- CoolBrands 2008 survey reveals Brummy accent is considered least cool
- “Howay the lads” as Geordie accent is voted most cool regional English accent
- And local pride sees each region voting its own accent as the coolest

The Brummy accent has been voted the least cool accent by a CoolBrands poll of more than 2,000 members of the British public – a ‘kick in the teeth’ for the people of the West Midlands. This latest survey is the first comprehensive look into what accents people see as cool – and just 2% of respondents in the study thought Brummy was the coolest accent.

The Queen’s English (received pronunciation) was named as the top accent, with 20% of respondents tipping the classic, traditional and upper-class accent as the coolest – showing that having no strong regional accent is the coolest way to speak.

The Scottish accent was named as the UK’s second coolest accent with 12% naming it as the coolest and it’s great news for the Geordie nation because the North East’s distinctive accent was named as England’s coolest.

Cool Accents 2008 / 09

· Queen’s English, 20%

· Scottish, 12%

· Geordie, 9%

· Yorkshire, 7%

· Cockney, 7%

· Northern Irish, 6%

· Welsh, 5%

· Scouse, 4%

· Mancunian, 4%

· West Country, 3%

· Brummy, 2%

· Other/Don’t Know, 21%


Anna Hartley:
Daniel Lipman:


The Mookster said...

What a pile of utter shit! The overuse of 'c***est' (asterisks to protect the eyes of other readers) almost caused me to vomit blood.

On the other hand, skillful wit from the LiS reporter, bravo!

Lost In Showbiz said...

he's good, isn't he!